At the age of 6th grader, I had my first love. Actually, since I was like 3rd grader, I went out with him but I did not really have memories during my 1st grade through 5th grade. Knowing that the age of 13 is pure at all and do not know what is love, I liked him very much and he liked me same as I liked him. During my 6th grade, I spent my time happily enough day by day. The one memory that I remember is I confessed him first that I like him. We spent most of time together, and then we broke up when we separated to different middle school. Even though we broke up, we left as a good friend each other. Few years later, I came to Saipan and heard of him from my friends and in msn. He was fine, and everything was fine too. However, few months later, I heard that he died from another best friend. I yet have many good feelings toward him and miss him a lot, maybe more than my parents. So if I could bring one person back to my life, I would bring him. When I was 6th grader, and having same class with him, we tried to be a partner together and our friends helped us to be a partner. We tricked our teacher and became a partner. He asked me to hear funny stuffs by his mp3, and we heard it together during the class, and we laughed secretly together. If someone bothers me, he attacked that person for revenge of mine. We had secret journal which process is like I wrote my daily journal or something about him or what I want to tell him, then I give it to him to reply my journal. So we keep repeating the same thing and if we fill out every page, we read it together. If a day is a special day like Valentine’s Day or pepero day, both I and he bought bunch of chocolates or peperos to give each other. I bought chocolates with two full of bags. However when we tried to meet outside, we could not meet just two of us, because we were shy that just two of us are together. So we met with few more people in Han River. We went there to watch fireworks or to ride bicycle. One day of winter, we were going to home together, and he took me to my house first. That day was very cold, but we walked at intervals from each other and we did not even talk but we txt together on that cold day. So our hands were frozen. When we reached to my house, the time was late so bus broke up. I felt so sorry for him so I gave my hug for him to be warm. Then he walked all the way to his house. There are so many memories to talk about and I am melancholy right now.
After we broke up, we left as a good friend to each other and we contacted frequently. When I called him as my first contactor, it was so fun to talk about our memories when we went out before. We were arguing about which person liked which person more. Then I talked with his mom too, because she was used to be liked me as his girlfriend and as her daughter. I made promise to call him again and said good bye. Few months later, my mom told me that he is at the hospital. I did not know anything so I asked my friend what is going on. My friend told me that he fought with someone and one pushed him and he, my first lover, fall down knocking on the edge of the desk harshly. Inside of his brain, something destroyed with lots of blood, so he was in a state of coma. He was in a state of coma for few weeks and then he died.
I was absent minded when I heard of that news, but I did not cry. It was too shock to cry for me that my first lover died. I could not even stay next to him because I was in Saipan, and I could not even go to his funeral. I still have many things to talk about with him, and I still remember how were we when we went out, and I still dreamed of him a lot. Every time when I think of him, I went to his homepage, and write how I have been doing and say hello to him. I still have his pictures in my phone, and I miss him a lot. So if he can be back to my life, I will spend as many days as I can.
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